This week my father has his 90th birthday. He does not live close enough for me to go celebrate, and he really doesn't mind if I don't go. He would rather have a really good meal that he likes! As we age, simplicity is vital.
A pastor often spends much time with people in defining moments like birth and death. I was not aware of the meaning of these moments when I was growing up. I barely recall the funerals of my father's parents, who lived close enough for us to attend. I wanted to go to my maternal grandmother's funeral, but did not have the opportunity.
When my mother passed away in 2006 at the age of 85, I had been dealing with life and death first-hand as a pastor for several years. I was not shocked nor dismayed at the actual dying. I was more saddened by what we did not have - a deep, accepting relationship. I found myself missing the sound of her voice. I came to realize my mother was a "classy" woman. I learned that she gave up many of her own dreams for the sake of other people in her life.
As I continue to deal with a future filled with sadness and sorrow - and yes, joy and laughter too, I realize how vital it is to cherish life - real living. For each of us, the definition of such words is unique. For me, it's about what memories, what legacy, I'm going to leave behind me.
Yesterday I watched Prince Charles watching old home movies he said he had not seen in years. They included his young childhood, family vacations, and fun times. When pictures of his grandfather, the previous King of England, came on the screen, he was visibly touched. He wished he had known his grandfather as a person.
Is there someone in your life...your history...your past that you wish you knew better? Start digging and see what you discover. Then begin making sure your children and grandchildren KNOW YOU...what makes YOU tick. They won't forget it.
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