Thankfulness

    I am very thankful for my children and their spouses this morning. I am thankful that my kids have huge hearts for others, and have forgiven their parents for our less-than-perfect parenting. I am thankful that we can talk and share, cry and laugh together. I am thankful that God provided them with their life partners, and for the wonderful families they have.
I am thankful for their support, prayers, and encouragement.
    I know that I am blessed. So many difficult times, painful situations, hurts and struggles have been ours as a family. Our shared pain and passion to be world citizens helps to draw us together. Our acceptance of God's radical grace for us and for each other helps keep our relationship real and freeing.
    I am thankful for my 5 grandchildren: Caleb, Evelyn, Ryan, Nikolas, and Chase. How I love these children!
    I am so thankful.

My Grandsons' Parents

    Casey and Sharon met at Sears in Anderson, IN. I'm sure he was unaware of the crazy family into which he was entering! Casey's from Iowa, and graduated from Ball State University. (He's looking for a job right now---anyone hiring? Northwest is preferred by his mother-in-law!!!)
     Sharon spent from age 3 to 14 in Thailand. She went to 7th and 8th grade in a boarding school in Malaysia, and was HOOKED on boarding school. She became a teacher, graduating from Anderson University, and has spent most of her life overseas.
     Casey has always helped me fix stuff in my home when he visits---this time: installing a new sink, changing some faucets, hauling stuff--snow tires, stuff up and down out of the attic, changing the oil in my car and washing it, installing new doorknobs and fixing others.
Thanks, Casey.
     Sharon works all the time --- when she's not cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, playing with kids, giving baths, she's writing, editing, or translating. Sharon is so compassionate, and cares about people...her heart has been enlarged by the people in Asia --- and around the world. She cares deeply, always risky, because it hurts so badly to leave the people you love. Like all who become world-citizens, she spends much of her life saying "goodbye," which is so hard. We treasure our moments together.
     I am so thankful for these two amazing people, and I am so blessed.

Enlarging your Heart...and Paying the Price

    I am still weeping --- they've driven off, heading towards Iowa and Indiana to see more folks who love them. I would keep them here if I could. I have so loved learning to know my grandsons...and it breaks my heart to say goodbye...to see them go. They have brought me such joy, driven me a little nuts (even though I was pretty far gone already!), and challenged me to new levels in many ways.
    Loving people is a dangerous adventure. It opens you up to great wonders, and great pain. We will make it through this, and I know God has more great times ahead of us.
    But right now I'm sad. I'm glad I know how I feel and can feel it. Joy and Sadness walk hand-in-hand through my life and I embrace them.

This Will be a Joy Strength Week

   This will be a JOY STRENGTH week, when I will have to dig deep and depend on the joy of the Lord...my daughter and her family are leaving for points east --- I have been blessed to have them here for almost a month. We've had both sheer joy moments, and joy strength ones --- with 9 1/2 yr. old Ryan, 7 yr. old Niko, and 2 yr. old Chase. I have learned some things about my grandchildren this week:

• They are all very sensitive boys, and need a lot of time investment.
• Ryan and Niko are very spiritually sensitive too. Last night Niko and I were watching a show on TV and he asked about someone on the show: Grandma, do you think they follow Jesus? I have loved watching Ryan sing the worship songs in church the weeks they've been here. What joy!
• They are all very good at things: Ryan and Niko are great draw-ers and have great imaginations; they love PS2; all the boys love music and can sing (that means carry a tune); Ryan likes to write; they love to do Karate and have great hand-eye coordination. Chase is the inquisitive, amazing ball of energy, with a heart-breaking smile and dimples.  
• Like all boys, they spend a lot of communication time making car, airplane, bomb, and gun sounds --- and other not-so-polite sounds!
• They all love the water, making water balloons, spraying the hoses, swimming in a pool.
• Both Ryan and Niko will talk seriously about life, their feelings, what they miss about Indonesia, and what's happening in their lives right now --- when out riding in the car with me.
• All the boys have been very good with Grandpa Marvin, playing balloons with him, and laughing with him. Chase is especially funny with Grandpa --- he never knew him before H.D. and he doesn't see disability.

   I have made note of special needs to pray for this month: new, good friends in the place they finally settle, ability to truly love themselves and accept themselves for who they are, that they would have more PEACEFUL times instead of FIGHTING times, that they would continue to grow in their knowledge of the Lord, and that they would be surrounded by a community of faith where they could mature and be part of a vibrant, healthy Body of Christ.
   More about their parents tomorrow.
 

JOY MUSINGS

    Sometimes my life is on "overload," so I need to sit down, breath deeply, meditate on things, and let my mind refocus. This morning seems like one of those mornings.
    It is wonderful to be able to play with my grandsons...to draw, laugh, play games (they are planning a round of "Huckle-Buckle Beanstalk" when they wake up this morning --- email me for details!!). Last night we made crazy pictures and paper airplanes.
    It is wonderful to sit with my husband, help him eat, talk about funny adventures from the past (they weren't funny then). With a few special friends, and Sharon's family we celebrated 40 years together. Sharon helped him and he walked into the house with a dozen roses and a card. I got him a much simpler gift: his favorite SHRIMP CHIPS!
    It is wonderful to live in the Pacific Northwest and I'm looking forward to a couple days at our church Family Camp up in the Cascades...1 1/2 hr. drive to staggeringly beautiful mountains.
    It is wonderful to know that I am God's child, and that He wants to continue to provide everything I need for doing all He has asked me to do with my life. He has redeemed so many broken things in my past, and obviously He's not done yet.
   Psalm 92:4 "You thrill me, Lord, with all you have done for me! I sing for joy because of what you have done." (NLT)
   Start your "WONDERFUL" list this morning and notice how it affects your day.

Do We NEGATE JOY?

    My daughter and her husband have 3 boys, and have returned from Indonesia...needing an appropriate vehicle. In 2008 I purchased a 2007 Kia Sedona van. I have hauled many youth, children and adults to various functions, carried huge loads of "stuff," and the van has been a super vehicle for me. But this family needs this van. So we made a deal. And I was back doing what I enjoy: car shopping!
    We are under a time constraint, so I have been reading about cars online, looking at some dealerships...you know the routine.
    Last Thursday morning my journal contains this prayer entry: "Father, please guide me in this whole car situation." And immediately the name of an elderly couple in our church came to my mind. I knew they were possibly selling a car, but had not talked to them about it. I now own a 1999 Ford Taurus with 75,000 miles on it...at a great price. They bought it new, and it's pretty much like new inside and out. It will do for me while I save $$$ for a newer car later and my kids will have the van they need. I wrote: ANSWERED across my prayer.
    As I was working through the deal, a nagging thought popped up several times: "Yeah, but think of the 2 or 3 other families you know who need a car, too. You could have borrowed money and bought a newer car and let them have this one." And I had some moments of feeling a bit GUILTY!
    Do you ever allow your JOY at God's provisions or answers to prayer to be dulled by feelings of false guilt?
    Do you come away from great moments of JOY thinking you don't deserve to feel that way?
    Do you find it hard to accept gifts or services from someone else, but usually get your good feelings about yourself from helping others?
    Sometimes it helps to remember that Jesus accepted gifts and hospitality from people --- because He didn't own a home, a car; He didn't have a bank account nor and IRA. His Father provided for Him through the people around Him.
    Giving and receiving JOY --- signs of maturity (from Living From The Heart Jesus Gave You).

PEACE
   
    

Joy Moments

     Since our daughter and her family have been here, the stomach flu has hampered some of our plans. But that's over, and last night we brought Marvin home to eat dinner with us. After he ate, he laid down on the couch in the living room. 2-year-old Chase brought a book and stood by the couch and "read" it to Grandpa. The look of joy and wonder on Marvin's face was priceless.
      Tonight when we returned from Yakima, Ryan and Niko went with me to see Grandpa. He was ready for bed, so we sat in his room. Ryan taught me a new game, and we played while Grandpa watched. We helped him floss his teeth and I trimmed his toenails. (It's the little things that are needed!) Marvin smiled most of the time we were there --- just being in the presence of Niko and Ryan.
      There are many moments that are not so joyful, but those times of seeing grandchildren ignite the inner spirit and soul of who Marvin really is...well, those are joy moments!
      God's goodness has been very evident to me today in many ways!