Infants: self-absorbed, self-centered, see something they like and they want to have it, need someone to provide food and water, safety and security, and help with the functions of being human! Then someone teaches children to be independent and how to live in a society where sharing is vital for healthy relationships (hopefully). For the next x number of years, young people and adults can often take care of themselves quite well.
Then something begins to happen: Aging, where adults return to the early stages of life: needing someone to provide food and water, a desperate search for safety and securty, and help with all the functions of being human. Independence slips from our fingers as we give up driving, need someone to cook for us, clean and repair our homes, do our laundry, and more.
I watched her, the 80+ little woman with snowy white hair, as she very slowly ate her lunch. She talked clearly and gave answers that made sense...when she heard the question. There was no vacant stare of Alzheimers or dementia. Her eyes were bright and interested in what was happening around her.
Because she is a slow eater, others were done with their meal while she had 1/2 a plate of food left. Dessert was brought out for her table-mate, and placed on the placemat next to her.
Suddenly her head came up, and as she chewed, her gaze fell on the dessert. She never took her eyes off of it. She chewed and stared. Everyone was watching for one little movement, when her hand would reach out for her neighbor's dish. She didn't care whose it was...it looked good and she wanted it. But she wasn't quite quick enough! It was gone before she had a chance. The tense shoulders relaxed and she continued chewing and waiting for her own serving.
No guile...not one ounce of revenge or anger...simply "see it" and "want to eat it," no matter who it belongs to.
Ah, one day, I too will be in her shoes!
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